The best ways to manage your child’s phone use, according to an expert

Niamh Ryan

Your child getting their very first phone is a big step

If they’re a young teenager, you’ll obviously want them to still have supervision so they can stay safe online.

Luckily, Dr David Coleman has some top tips for parents who are giving their child their first phone.

Monitoring software

It’s important to check up on what your child is doing on their phone, for their own safety. According to Dr. Coleman there are many apps available that allow parents to remotely control apps and screen time.

“Let it be clear from the outset that you will be actively monitoring the sites they visit, the nature of their interactions with peers on things like Snapchat or WhatsApp and that you will be looking at their TikTok and Instagram profiles,” he says.

Phone-free time

He also says that it’s important to have certain times of the day be strictly offline.

“Finding time to reconnect as a family, especially when family life is busy, is golden and makes positive parenting more likely.”

Avoid using the phone as a control tactic

While it’s easy to take away their phone as punishment, this can lead to problematic behaviour. They may become less trusting and more secretive because of it.

“Try to build your relationship with them, positively, so that appealing to their better nature becomes the best way to influence their behaviour.”

Public areas only

Another tip Dr. Coleman has is to only allow the use of phones in public areas of the house. This means no phones in the bathroom or bedroom.

“This gives you a greater opportunity to informally check what they are up to, you’ll have a better sense of how much they are using their phone, and it reduces the likelihood of your child getting lost on the Internet, away from the family, for hours at a time.”

Lead by example

While parents may say kids are too addicted to their phones, the adults are just as bad.

If you tell your teenager that they spend too much time on their phone but are then contradicting yourself by being glued to your screen, it won’t go down well.

“Your behaviour will be a more powerful model for your children’s behaviour than any rules or values about phone use that you express verbally,” Dr. Coleman says.

Lead by example and show them how it easy it is to stay offline for a few hours.